Busy, busy, busy

Well it was a very busy day yesterday and Grace did not really want to nap too much. I have been having a pretty good week, not perfect but it's getting there. We are going to start packing for the weekend tonight and then I can do the laundry we need done tomorrow and hopefully we will get away as planned *fingers crossed*.

I am planning on taking everything I will need for breakfasts and probably lunches too so we won't have to eat out too much while we are there. There is not alot of choice in Oliver and what is there is not the greatest. Alot of little diners and then some fast food. I am going to the Italian deli on Thursday to get some meats, cheese and buns so we can make lunch on the road and then I'll get some extra for in the room. I am really looking forward to getting into the fruit stands and all the amazing fresh fruit from the okanagan =) mmmmmm!!!!!!

Weekends

Weekends are too short! I know I don't work right now but is so nice to have that extra time as a family. Yvon has been working so hard that he is bagged in the evening. I just love those 2 days of us time. I have realized that part of a balanced life is some time alone, just the 2 of us. Even if we just sit alone while Grace is napping, it's so nice.

So, I got on the scale this morning and I was 175.3, a loss of 1.1 pounds! I thought it was going to be better but I over ate a bit this weekend and it showed. Oh well, atleast I got most of the week right =) I am a little nervous about our trip to Oliver this weekend. Yvon and I think we have the driving schedule figured out and we should be able to keep Grace happy. As far as babies go she is great but it's a long time in the car for her. We are going to try and take nice long breaks for her and it'll be relaxing for us too. I am concerned about keeping Grace cool and hydrated. Since she is only 3 months old they don't recommend giving her any water. I have been freezing alot of my milk lately and hopefully I will have enough that I can get a bit of a break and keep her happy. Fingers crossed =)

So today I was very happy with my loss and like an idiot I celebrated with McDonalds? Really...what was I thinking? Well it's over now and it tasted great. I need to move on from this and not let it get in the way of eating well for the rest of the week. I can't believe July is almost over.....what is the plan for August?

Fat Burger...mmmmm

So yesterday I had Fat Burger and it was amazing! I think if I ate there often I would be huge and die of a heart attack. I felt pretty gross after eating my burger and was greatfull for the walk back to my brothers. It wasn't the longest walk but it helped =) I did not make the best choices throughout the day but I didn't make the worst either.

It was so nice being downtown yesterday. It was much warmer there then it was when I left the house so I was stripping off mine and Gracie's jackets. When we were out I had to use the mothers room in the mall to nurse and change her. It is amazing to me what some people view as okay. This room has glass walls so everyone can see you, I try and be discreet as I don't want to show everyone my boobs! Some small children were watching me through the window wondering what the room was, their mom explained and then let them come in and look at me. She would tell them not to bother me but it is a small room and it got pretty crowded with the 6 spectators...if you don't need the room then get out! I am also amazed at how rude people can be on an elevator, since Grace is only 3 months I have to always take an elevator as obviously she can't go on the escalators, I got the rudest snear and sound from an eldderly man and his wife who were on the elevator when I got on. There were only the 2 of them on there and they seemed pissed that I made them move over so I could get on....like I should have waited for the next one so they could have it to themselves. I try and be polite about getting around and what not with a stroller but really there aren't alot of things I can do to change the size or shape to better accommodate spaces, so I just feel like instead of being polite and nicely asking people to move so I can get past without hitting them I should just hit them and they might understand more!

Vent over....today will be a good day. We are going out with my mom and then off to dinner at the inlaws with some family friends who want to see Grace. Have a great Friday!

Good Friends and Good Food

Last night 3 of our friends stopped by to see how Grace is growing =) They brought dinner with them and it was amazing. I had suggested ordering pizza as it was easy and no work for any of us but one of the girls had just been at the gym and didn't want to go backwards! She suggested they stop at Safeway and pick up roasted chicken, salad and some garlic bread, it was perfect! We sat on the patio until 9:30 and it was great. Grace was so pooped after all her visitors she slept until 9!

Today we are going to go downtown for a bit and then off to my brothers to meet up with the family for dinner. Tonight will not be good as I think we are going to Fat Burger. Well it will be good but not for trying to eat right, I just have to make sure I make good choices during the day and then I will enjoy my burger =) We are going to walk there so that should help!

I am feeling like I have found a much better space in my head right now, somewhere that I am not obsessing about what I am doing and what I need to do. It's not all about the scale, it is about making good choices!

Good Days

The weather is just amazing, I am loving all of this sun. It's a bit warm for Grace but she is doing good and the air conditioner is really helping...all of us! My sweet little angle is still sleeping a minimum of 8 hours per night and she is only 3 months old! She is so amazing!

So I got on the scale this morning...I know I shouldn't, I should only weigh myself once a week but sometimes I just can't help it! And I was happy to see that paying attention is actually working...I was already down almost 1 pound =) If I stick with it I should be able to do this. I am not trying to restrict myself too much, just everything in moderation.

I got out for a really nice long walk this morning and I think I am going to try and do the reverse tomorrow (a little more hilly the other way). I have to make sure I do it early because it is getting really hot during the day again. Well that's all for now, have a good day =)

Good Morning?

I am tired today! My daughter slept 8 1/2 hours and I guess I slept about 8 and it just didn't feel like enough. I have to go and pick up some fresh groceries today, I think I will walk. It's a little overcast today so it should be nice. I ate pretty well for the rest of the day yesterday but I had a couple of cookies at my inlaws for dessert. they were sitting there calling my name, it is so much easier if they just aren't there. I have such a weakness for sweets, it's like I am drawn to them!

I have a date with one of my girlfriends to go for a walk today. It is so nice to have her around more right now (she is a teacher). It gives me some options on company and she is somewhat health minded and trying to stay in shape so she is always willing to go for a nice walk.

Well I have to make a shopping list and decide what I am going to make for dinner....We are having company tomorrow so I am trying to come up with some easy meals....any ideas?

Monday.....

I hate Monday's. Monday always seems to be the day to start a diet, I either don't get past the morning or I go almost too gungho. I seem to be able to kind of stick to what I am doing. I am starting to make better choices and move more. I have been avoiding blogging as I have not had anything that is very positive to report....I have been accountable to no one.

Does everyone struggle with Mondays?

This morning I weighed in at 176.4, not great but not bad considering what I have been eating. I guess breast feeding is the amazing thing. If I actually put the effort in I would be at goal by now =p

I had a sneak eat at lunch and there is no one here to sneak from...it's like I am having an affair with food. The one good thing is there are no more drumsticks in the house, the bad thing...I ate most of them. I wish I was like my husband and was happy with the occasional treat...and a small one at that. We were talking in the car yesterday after we both had a little treat from Purdy's, he said the chocolate bar was too much chocolate, he would have liked just a small piece, I on the other hand could have eaten 2 more. When I said that he said he related with beer, he loves a good beer but it just ends up making him want another. I am that way with food. I guess we all have our weaknesses, I just wish mine wasn't making me fat!

I really want to be a healthy role model for my daughter, teach her how to have an appropriate relationship with food. I love being active (sure we all have our lazy days) it's just that eating crap thing I need to get past.

This week I am going to try and make healthier choices and be honest with myself....stop having this affair with crap food and blog regularly. Talk to you tomorrow =)

Words

Words is all this is. I don't seem to be able to follow up anything with the proper actions. I sit and type and talk about what I need to do but I am not doing it. I have been thinking and eating this past week. I have been trying to decide what it is I need and can do. I know what I am supposed to say but it is not working because I am not doing it....It's like all I want to do is eat crap....I need to make this change before I get to far gone and it gets to be more than I can handle. I need to be honest with myself and figure out what is stopping me...I am afraid to fail and I am afraid to succeed...again. I have done this before, it was alot of work and slowly but surely I managed to put all the weight back on, and that was before I had a baby as an excuse. I am afraid I will succeed and not be happy and put all the weight back on. I don't know if it's just easier to be afraid or what it is....I think I need to sit down and talk about this and make myself a plan that I can stick with. The plan I came up with at the end of last week is a plan that I can easily live with, I just need to do it. I know this is how everyone feels but it feels like the loneliest place on earth....

I have a plan!

Thank you for the comments Missy and Syl - made my morning =)

Well I stole Syl's idea and enlisted my husband to help keep me on track. I sat down last night and realized I am not following the WW program the way I should be and I think I have just been there too many times lately. I am going to try something new and track my calories. I looked it up and since I am still breastfeeding full time I should be eating between 1800-2200 calories per day to lose weight. I set up that I am going to do a minimum of 45 minutes cardio 6 days per week and then I will do 2 of the workout routines that I found in Shape magazine. I will do the Kim Kardashian 3 days per week and then there is one that incorporates the Bosu and I will do that 2 days per week. I hope this works =)

I measured my breakfast and have already written it down and counted the calories. But before I ate I got on the scale and I weighed in at 176 lbs....not as bad as I thought it was going to be but I have been fighting the same pound for weeks! Here is to a fresh start this morning!

Today is really hot! I love that summer has finally shown up! I am going to pack Grace up and go for a nice long walk...with lots of water =)

Magic Pill?

I wish there was one! I really want a magic pill to make all this weight go away. I don't want to have to work at this, why am I not one of those naturally thin people? why does this have to be so hard? I just want to wake up and be thin and be able to make all the right choices. Love fruits and vegetables not candy, chocolate and chips!

I was hoping to start out better today but I didn't, I picked up right where I left off yesterday, eating crap. I am sick of WW but I know it is what I need to do. How do you get your head straight?

Feeling

I don't know how to feel. I had a very good week and really made an effort, then on the weekend I did okay...I kind of fell apart yesterday. It's like my head switched gears and all I wanted to do was eat crap....Today I need to find that "happy" place again. I need to get some more movement in and less food =)I hope I have not completely negated all my hard work from earlier in the week. I just have to make positive choices. We took Grace on her first long car ride and it went okay....Started off great and then she melted down, big time! We got her calmed down and back in the car and then she finally had a little sleep. She just did not want to be in the car. It had taught us that when we go to Oliver in a couple of weeks she will need to be out of her car seat for a minimum of 1 hour to just relax and kick. She did amazing at the wedding we had to go to on Satuday, one tiny little melt down when she was eating and then she was fine. It was such a relief for me! Well the sun is out and we will be going for a walk a little later.